“In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.” (Matthew 5:16 ESV)

My life has been a constant spiritual warfare that has continued from a young age.  In my early days I was precocious child. I was sent away to school because my mother found me hard to deal with day-in and day-out where I became rebellious and aggrieved in spirit. 

I suffered under a school with a cruel house master.  Sadly for him he had picked the wrong person because, unknown to both of us, God was watching over me for my good and not for harm (See Psalm 37:12-13).  So by the age of sixteen this school had only succeeded in making me very fit, resentful of authority and as hard as nails.  Disturbed by my school experience, it allowed darkness in and made me emotionally closed down.

After passing just enough O levels I moved to a grammar school near home. At my new school, like a flower opening up after the storm, I did not do that much work but I found the freedom to express myself in being daft, carefree and driving fast but deep within the psychological trauma had not been dealt with.

Later in the world of work I was successful after six jobs to find my niche by God’s provision.  This also lead to me getting married and buying a house.

Still the battle for my life continued in the heavenly realms and this ended in the breakup of my first marriage.  By now the Holy Spirit had already come into my life and was making inroads into my issues, breaking the chains from the past, eventually bringing deliverance, healing and forgiveness.

Now, in my retirement, having undergone a continuing transformation I find I have a choice.  I can hide away to become a static monument to what God has done, like an old mothballed lighthouse that has had its light removed to become a residential home, like the one on Isle of Lundy. 

Alternatively by the light of God’s Love I can continue to fight the terrors of past memories equipped by Grace and Holy Spirit to shine and not let myself become decommissioned by life, church or society.  When Jesus took captivity captive He set up the way for the power of God’s Love light to shine into lives, so we may also stand out, guiding people into safe harbour away from the rocks of self-destruction and the worldliness of today.

My memories still linger seeking to silence God’s expression through me but God’s Love is greater to quell them.  The Light of Jesus is able to shine from within, so I keep on keeping on. It is a choice, a promise and a command.

Prayer: LORD, today we ask You to shine in us because You alone bring Life.  May Your Light shine through us into the places we are sent, in Jesus’ name, amen.

Roderick Marshall