My Daughter’s Birthday

by | May 15, 2013 | Family, Forgiveness, Reconciliation

A day of joy! A day of happenings! I remember it well. It was Nov. 18, 1969 and I was barely nineteen years old. I had been earlier discharged from the military for pregnancy and this was it! In those days, it was a time of discovery as we had no modern way of knowing the gender of the child. I was expecting a daughter, one who would be like me and would do all that was possible for her in her life and she did that and more.

I had gone into labor early in the day of the 18th. I had stomach cramps and attributed that to gas. I asked my husband to go to the store and get me some Pepto Bismol. I took some and still continued with this foreign cramping. So I figured I might be in ready to have my child. I told David he should take me to the hospital at about 9:00 PM that evening as I could not sleep for the pains that seemed to be coming periodically. So off we went. They admitted me into the Grissom Air Force Hospital in Northern Indiana and she was born at approximately 15 minutes after midnight.

I watched her being born though it was scary for me at the time. Also my husband was not allowed to partake in this miracle of birth. He held my hand in the labor room as I cussed and probably attacked him. Back in that time dad’s were just allowed to see the baby after it’s birth. They asked me what date I wanted as her birth since the time was so close and I chose this day, Nov. 18th, 1969.

Today, I feel sorrow. My daughter is not dead but life has taken her away from me. Her dad died at 38 years old, too young for any to accept, so it was hard. Before that he and I had our problems and it hurt my children, my lovely daughter and two sons later. After this gift of my daughter, Tiffany Marie Hunt, I gave birth to her brother, Dana Lamare Hunt, November 23, 1970 and another son, Nathaniel David Hunt, born June 16th, 1972. These children I will cherish to my dying day. So many years have passed since I have seen any of them.

I now have three little boys who are my grandchildren. The oldest, my son Dana’s boy will be an adult soon and I have never met him. I talked to Christian on the phone a couple times from New York. This was a few years ago. Tiffanny’s son, Greg is probably in middle school or close to it. My youngest grandson, Evan, is probably nine now. It is hard to know. I had them over once a few years ago when Evan was a baby. I have seen these younger two boys a handful of times. Time and circumstance has made us all a victim.

Whose fault is it at this point? I don’t believe anyone consciously decided not to see family anymore but I find it it happening more than we talk about. It started with a small amount of hate. My children were products of divorce and each one also divorced their spouses. As they get older I have more hope that they will learn to forgive and forget or at least to forgive. I am so alone but for my God today. I know in His wisdom there is a reason for this. Is this making me vulnerable by disclosing something I have been too afraid to talk about because my emotions are so fragile?

As I spoke to my 91 year old dad today, I asked him a question he couldn’t answer. We were talking about children and Tiffanny’s birthday and how kid’s today just seem not to have time for others. He had no answer except in our family it is prevalent. My dad does not see my daughter either, maybe a little more than I but not often. Maybe she can find many reasons to hate me but I can think of nothing my dad has done to her.

Love is something that I didn’t identify until I learned what it was like to do without it. Then I stopped for a long period to find out what true love was all about. It is so simple. It is loving someone without expecting anything in return. Webster’s Dictionary cannot define what unconditional love is as it is supernatural and can only come from God. It is holding a wet baby and thinking it is beautiful when it probably isn’t. It’s getting up in the night and walking a child all night with the colic while it cries and knowing you have to go to work the next morning. It is changing a diaper and realizing that little baby is comfortable. It is a laugh from a tiny soul that can’t even talk yet.

Most of all, it is free to anyone who has the ability to love God and know that He is the Word and the Word is Love. I realize He gave us ten commandments but there is another one and it says that we must love one another. Put aside discontent in families. I know that there has been much within my own. Why are things that are so simple the hardest for us all to learn?

Sharlett F. Hunt


My Daughter’s Birthday