Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

(Ephesians 5:21, NIV)

A man was telling his friend about a serious argument he’d had with his wife the night before.  “It ended,” he said, “when she came crawling to me on her hands and knees.”

The friend raised an eyebrow. “What did she say?”

The husband grinned. “She said, ‘Come out from under that bed, you coward!’”

Husbands sometimes like the idea of their wives coming to them on their hands and knees. Many of us can quickly quote Ephesians 5:22: “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands, as to the Lord.” (NIV) But that verse, pulled out of context, can become a weapon instead of a blessing.

Yes, the Bible teaches the headship of the husband, but it’s not a headship patterned after a dictator or warlord.  The model is Jesus Christ himself.  And when we look at him, we see a leader who wasn’t afraid to kneel and wash his disciples’ feet (John 13).

In fact, just one verse before the famous “wives submit” passage, Paul lays down a principle that applies to every Christian: “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” (Ephesians 5:21 NIV) Mutual submission means we put the needs of others ahead of our own, not because they’ve earned it, but because we follow the example of Christ.

For husbands, that means loving our wives sacrificially, as Christ loved the church (Ephesians 5:25). For wives, it means honoring their husbands. For all Christians, it means choosing humility over pride and service over selfishness.

True leadership in God’s kingdom isn’t about demanding your way.  It’s about recognizing that authority in Christ is always exercised for the good of others, not for our own comfort or ego.

So perhaps today we all need to spend some time on our hands and knees — not hiding under the bed like the man in the story, but kneeling in humble service to those around us. That might mean helping others without being asked, listening without interrupting, or forgiving without keeping score.

The beautiful irony of humility is that when we lower ourselves in service, God raises us up in honor (James 4:10).

Prayer: Father, teach me the humility of Christ. Help me to serve others with a willing heart, not because I have to, but because I love you. May my leadership always reflect your servant heart.  In Jesus’ name, amen.

Alan Smith
Reprinted with permission from Alan Smith’s Thought For the Day