There I was… an Air Force officer on board US Navy’s 2nd Fleet Command and Control ship, the USS Mt Whitney sailing a few hundred miles off the eastern coast of the United States. I was serving on a multi-service, multi-national training exercise. It was new and different… fairly exciting to experience “life” at sea.

It was a welcomed break for me because my life was a wreck. Being at the tail end of depression, my life seemed an overwhelming failure… a divorce and mediocre job performance. Worst of all, my existence was an empty shell desperate for answers, comfort, and most of all… truth.

Now… a ship of this magnitude has powerful engines… makes for a steady hum. That coupled with the wind and crashing waves of the Atlantic provided me a place to “escape”. My escape was the ship’s bridge… at night.

At the end of a long day, I had a desire to be alone to pray. Making my way to the bridge, and stepping outside, the sea air was both refreshing and invigorating. However, my natural surroundings appeared turbulent…and also, we were cruising in “lights-out” mode, so I couldn’t see squat. Despite my blindness, I inched my way to the railing.

Secure at the rail, I flopped on my winter parka hood and bowed my head to pray. My question to God was this: “God, would you please show me a sign. Show me my life will normalize…and be free from the insanity”. It wasn’t so much that I wanted to go down in history, but rather, I wanted some meaning to my life.

Upon completion of my prayers, my tears subsided, and a resounding, “All in Good time…” echoed in my mind. I felt peace. Agreeable and comfortable, I lifted my eyes. And low and behold… there before me was Gods’ Dominion! Clearly, things were not as they first appeared… so dark and dismal. There was a bright moon and a million stars!!! My “sign from God” took my breath away.

Looking back, it was all a matter of perspective. My perspective was one of pride. My definition of pride is: me thinking I am in charge of my life. That is false – I am not! The truth is God has the whole universe in His hands!! I realize now that the stormy weather and darkness represented my worldly perspective, one that precluded me from seeing God, and all His majesty. To stay out of my own proud, stinking way of thinking, I read, even teach scripture, and try to live a life pleasing to God. And yes!! I still get in the way of God’s plan and His desire to love me and keep me happy, but things seem to get better every day.

Praise God from Whom all blessings flow!!!

John Gage John.Gage@hill.af.mil