In 2011, life gave me a little squeeze, to find out what is really
inside, where and what my priorities are, when push comes to shove.
I have been busy both at home and at work. At home, with the
addition of two toddlers, whilst being a great joy and pleasure for a
maturing father, they are nevertheless all-consuming for Caroline and I,
so we find it hard to find the time for us. At work, with the closure of
one of the university's campuses, and the arrival of a large proportion
of students to my site, I find myself under a new review, the third in
twelve months!
With all this continued uncertainty hanging over
me, I have been getting depressed. Apparently, it became obvious,
because once, Caroline even suggested that I go to the doctor for help.
However, I praise God that when I called on Him as I found myself on the
threshold of being sucked down the plughole of despond again, He
answered my prayers and plugged the drain. I am aware, too, that others
must have been praying, for which I am thankful, because intercession
really does matter.
There were no shining lights or angels, no
instant change. He simply reminded me of what He has done for me in the
past in seemingly impossible situations that were outside of my control.
I remembered a time when I was unemployed with a small child and I was
down to my last ten pounds in the bank, with a mortgage, and then I
"found" the right job for me. It was exactly what was needed for what
happened next. I am clear that it was this insight and grace given to me
over the course of a day, and not my will, which delivered me back into
my right heart and mind, putting my faith in my God above how others
plan. All praise be to God who inhabits our praises and our beings: at
least the parts we are willing to give into His care!
So as God
reminded me that He has a plan for each of us, it encouraged me that I
do not have to be in control all the time, because we cannot plan for
the unforeseen. As Christians, we must do what we can and then submit it
to God. As I returned my trust to His will for me, He drew me back from
the precipice, and I found His inner peace waiting for me.
"For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor
rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height
nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate
us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord." (Romans 8:38-39 ESV)
Prayer:
Lord, forgive us because we have erred again. Whenever You come to us,
You clear away the fog and bring inner peace. Please direct our paths
and instill in us today Your God-with-us by the Holy Spirit, so that no
matter how things appear, we may know that when the living gets tough,
You are with us always, willing to make a difference. In Jesus' name, we
pray. Amen.
Rod Marshall
rmarshall@PROTECTED
Cheltenham, Gloucestershire, England
Thanks to
http://daily.presbycan.ca